Entries Tagged 'Earth Day' ↓

WALL DRUG: As seen on the TODAY SHOW!

Untitled-2

Happy Earth Day. Now look out!

Earth Day + the first really nice day of the year = a bike trail clogged with slow walking looky loos. Don’t get me wrong, I’m all for you going outside and enjoying the beautiful day that was today. However, you should memorize and follow a few simple rules first.

All the Boys Love Mandy Lane move

1. No matter how much you love your hetero-life-mate you need to make yourself aware of your surroundings. The bike path occasional has bikes on it. Know this.

2. Stay to the right. It’s simple. Do it. I don’t care if you’re a tattooed shirtless sex machine who doesn’t give a shit about the rules. The next time you stare me down while loping directly at me I’m going to leave tire marks on your forehead. That’s not a good look for you.

3. Say something like “on your left” or “passing you on your left” when you pass slower traffic. Likewise if someone says “on your left” or even “passing on your left” don’t jump all startled to your left. This ruins the effectiveness of the whole “on your left” phenomenon.

Wifey says it’s time to go get earthy. Follow the rules.

hetero-life-mate bikers

hetero-life-mate bikers

This one is for Kat . . .

Untitled-1

Porridge

Happy Earth Day. Now go recycle your bicycle and plant a garden in the trunk of your hybrid while rolling your own cigarettes

9_20_common_trash_sighting

I guess Angry Guy and I are adding to global warming;

Wouldn’t you know it – thin people contribute less to global warming, or so says a recent study.

Researchers at the London School of Hygiene and Tropical Medicine published a report Monday, based on food production and transportation factors, that contends lithe people step livelier on the planet. Their carbon footprint leaves less of an imprint.

Who cares. Skinny people are boring anyway, and they are no fun at BBQ’s.