Customer: I would like to apologize for my cousin’s rude behavior.
ME: I didn’t even notice.
Well, actually I did, but after 3 loaves of bread, a gallon of water, a salad swimming in dressing, one & half steaks and two gigantic loaded baked potatoes, I wasn’t really concerned about his rudeness but if he was going to eat me.
Customer: It’s always something with him, the lighting, the music, the way the steak is cooked.
ME: Well his steak was cooked wrong, he had a reasonable complaint.
Well, kinda, WTF is the difference between a medium well and well done sirloin? A hint of pink, otherwise they both taste the same, like shit.
Customer: We were kicking each other under the table because his behavior has come to be expected.
ME: Oh, I know what you mean.
What I wanted to say is, maybe you should get him a membership to Weight Watchers for Christmas. Either that or a gift certificate to Breadsmith.
Either way, you’ll be sending a STRONG message.
S. L. Ehrisman (c) 11/10/11