Popelitical Satire

1. They don’t call it WhiteChurch Lane for nothing.

2. The political Pope: Testing the winds of change.

3. “Say, did you guys see where there’s this Pizza Guy running for Pope?”…… …..”His name is Pierbattista Pizzaballa”…. …..”AND, it looks like he might be related to Batista somehow, too (?)” ….. ….. ( …. “Acutally, with a name like that, it sounds more like a character from some SNL skit” …. 🙁 ) #FatherGuidoSarducci

4. “Actually, Pizza Guy might have an inside track”….. 🙂

   https://www.cnn.com/2025/05/05/middleeast/cardinal-pizzaballa-jerusalem-pope-contender-intl-cmd

5. “Don’t think for one single minute that I’m above good sophomoric humor like this. But Trump (and A.I.) beat me to this, so I’m left to issue a virtue signal to the good politically progressive folks of Sioux Falls.”

6. Make sure to get your annual Catholic check-up. #NoButtsAboutIt

7. “…virtual signal,” that sounds like Hegseth spin to me 😉

8. Trump asked the Pope: “How many mulligans am I allowed today?”…..

9. The new Academy Award-winning movie – ‘From Dordt Darkness to Vatican Catacombs: “One man’s Hellish journeys with the Dutch and Italian Mafias”‘

10. The Vatican Dordt.

11. Finally, a new reason not to go to a Pride event.

12. But no one is talking about the Noem poster. Gucci Girl is going to Madison to get an honorary degree. Not bad for an online Jackrabbit. AND, Madison hasn’t had this much commotion since the time Nixon came to Madison to dedicate the Mundt Library (No, he actually did.). The Secret Service even had the college library parking lot blacktopped for Marine One, and Nixon brought with him the Kennedy Lincoln, too:

    https://library.dsu.edu/c.php?g=125199&p=819574

    Now, those are big deals, like the time the Governor came to Mayberry:

    https://www.youtube.com/shorts/zmJF-Ca29gU

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ja4Z3GV_8K4

    ( and Woodstock adds: “You know, I used to know a Jackrabbit that used to go online a lot and she had a lot of dough in her bag, too” …. 🙁 ) #StateACTRequirementIs18 #USDRequirementIs22 🙂

13. “I just called my bookie…. My money is on the Pizza Guy”….. ( …. “I sure hope he does me better than my Kentucky Derby picks….. ‘Owen Almighty’ and ‘Render Judgment’….. )

14. ‘The Exorcist IV: Keep on spinning even if your neck won’t.’

15. “Just one question…. Where’s my hotline to Matt P.?”

16. Vatican would never pay the tariff for Tenny. They need pious and honest, not PopeYouLyer politician. New Pope is American. Must be one of those via flight to El Salvador.

17. “I’ve heard of an American in Paris, but not Rome….. Man, I lost big with my bookie… I won’t be able to afford a good pizza for a month of Sundays now ….” 🙁 ….. ( …. “AND, he went to Villanova, too…. I wonder if he is any good at shooting hoops?”….. )

18. The Catholics have sent Trump a message. There are some Americans worth making Pope, but not all.

    ( and Woodstock adds: “Man, I love me a Leo… You know, Dua is a Leo, too 😉 ……. ” …… )

19. An American is the Pope, while the White House has a dope. What should we do? Perhaps, we should all elope, but where would we go? Life too often is a slippery slope that teaches us to cope. Now, soap on a rope might cleanse us, but is there any hope for Trump? Or, do we not care, because the answer to that is, nope?…. AND, remember, please don’t paint your house the color of taupe…. For it could impact the quote…. 🙂

20. To be fair, Noem deserves honorary degree for political service. She served well in many offices. It wasn’t until after she started chasing Trump with the state plane on state expenses that she abused her office. Worse now, she’s become a domestic pet killer and promotes Hispanic torture. Prisons are built with quota. We’re all prisoners awaiting the next flight to El Salvador. Build prisons here so we’ll be near grandmothers bringing us baked goods. When so many imprisoned, there’ll be no more budget for fraud and this matter will fix itself. Meanwhile, Canada is looking good if they’ll have us.

21. Noem might be a bagger, but is Leo a baller? ….. #VillanovaBasketball…. AND, now that Rome is bagged, are Canada and Greenland nervous?

22. heuther says if anyone deserves to be pope, it’s him.

23. Huether would make a great Pope. He enjoys an audience and always has something to say. AND, building fun palaces is kind of like building cathedrals. Plus, that hat they wear would make him look taller. AND also, once, during a Hot Harley Nights, I saw him standing on a moving pick-up bed and leaning up against its cab as he waved to the masses…. It’s the closest we’ll ever get to a Huethermobile…. But there’s just two things: Does anyone know if the Pope’s office is oval, and how JFK would have worn that papal gown?

24. As the joke goes: There will be a Pope from Chicago before the Cubs win another World Series.

    Chicago: The home of Al Capone, deep dish pizza, Mayor Daley, The Blues Brothers, the Chicago Picasso, the once Sears Tower, Clark Griswold, the Bears, Cubs, White Sox, and the Black Hawks, and now the newest Pope…… #OnlyInAmerica!….. Or, as Siegfried and Roy once said to Clark: “Chicago?!…. Fabulous!”

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=J0TEagjwEbQ

    ( and Woodstock adds: “Man, I used to have a cousin in Chicago…. He could tell you all you wanted to know about the 1960 election 😉 ” ……. )

25. “Wow, I can’t believe you forgot Rev. Jackson and Operation Push, Southside Obama, and then there’s also Michael Jordan, the Bulls, and two three-peats”….. 🙂 #VSGIsSlipping

26. “A N D, Chicago Seven, the Chicago Dog, and being only second to Warsaw in having a Polish population.” 😉

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