Fugly & Butt’erface newly named Alpacas at the Zoo!

The Great Plains Zoo recently held a competition to name the new junior Alpacas. While there was many submissions we were surprised by the winning names.

One parent whose 7 year old child submitted cried for days, “While my little angel loves butter, once I explained what ‘Fugly’ meant she just started bawling.”

One parent said, “So now we are going to let thug rappers submit names? The GPZ is going to H*ll”

We were curious why the zoo chose these controversial names when so many kids submitted more suitable names. Public Policy Director for the Zoo, Geoffrey P. Flamingo said, “Sure, we had cute names like ‘Ice Cream’ and ‘Root Beer’ and even ‘Diaper Dance’ but the staff who has to look at these two every day felt we needed something more appropriate. I mean, just look at them! They are a cross between a hornless goat and a goose. And even when they are attempting to be cute, they sneeze boogers everywhere.”

While I was taken back by the cruelness of the names, there was also a part of me that noticed they had this ‘I wish I was still in Peru’ look about them.

Maybe the new names will bring them more charity?



5 comments ↓

#1 D@ily Spin on 08.02.18 at 10:22 am

I’m thinking an Alpaca Chislic appetizer dish.

#2 teatime on 08.02.18 at 6:03 pm

Just another example of the increasing promotion of the casual attitude toward vulgarity, profanity and taking the Lord’s name in vain in our culture. It’s all so “in your face” now and sincere polite and decent conversation is harder and harder to find. Really, with all the cute names that likely were submitted, who picked this one?

Let’s just get those little kids started right into those bad words and pseudo-bad words and make sure they know what they mean! That’s just social progress, right?

Funny, how as kids grow and go through phases of using bad language, they brush it off as no big deal, roll their eyes at those who try to correct them. They carry the habit into adulthood, and then are surprised and SHOCKED the first time their sweet little baby learns to talk and one days tosses the F-bomb into casual conversation with their toys or while throwing a tantrum.

We can be better than this.

#3 l3wis on 08.02.18 at 7:54 pm

Tea time, I’m the vulgar one, I wrote this piece as satire.

#4 l3wis on 08.02.18 at 7:54 pm

There real names are Poppy and Willow.

#5 teatime on 08.03.18 at 1:14 am

l3wis: Look at me, believing that fake news! You’d think I was a liberal or something. Thanks for pointing it out.

That said, I still mean what I said in the comment.

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