SFPD

SFPD identifies Tuthill shooting suspect

l3wis January 12, 2015 2Comments

If you see this man contact either the SFPD or Ripley’s Believe it or Not.

South DaCola News
By Samuel Coldsweat

While the city and Tuthill Park neighborhood has been on the edge since a SF police officer said a suspect attempted to shoot at him, they think they have the answer. While the suspect has not been apprehended, they do know who ‘IT’ is.

He has been identified as ‘Sasquatch Earle Furworthy’ or as his friend’s call him, ‘Harry Balls’ which translates into ‘Harris-lan testicle’ in Latin.

He was believed to be living in the wooded area on top of the park since October, and is a regular on the sledding hill.

“We have been suspicious that it has been him since regulars at the sledding park haven’t seen him since Christmas, and in the last siting, sledders said he was mumbling something about making smoothies and wielding a frozen banana.” Says Chief Darth Cowbell. “The tips have been reliable since it helped us rule out the tooth fairy and a unicorn.”

When Cowbell was asked if they have any ideas of his location, Cowbell responded, “We assume he HEADED FOR THE HILLS!”

If caught, we were wondering if any charges could be brought up against a Mr. Furworthy for wielding a banana at an officer.

Cowbell said he consulted state law and with the help of city attorney Danny Fiddle-Faddle, they found a loop hole in the city charter to bring him up on charges if captured. According to Canon 13-7445 of city charter it is;

‘Illegal to point fruit (frozen or thawed) at officers when they are questioning your eating habits.’

“I really have to hand it to Danny, he really pulled that one, from, well, the air.” says Cowbell “He’s pretty good at ‘slippery’ law (no pun intended).”

As for leads, they are working with authorities from Washington State (Earle’s home state) to see if they can track him down, but he has extended family that looks very much like him, and quite honestly, they ain’t talking.

“Finding a ‘grunting’ interpretor is difficult these days, and if you do, they usually ask for several hundred pounds of beef jerky in payment,” says Cowbell.

We asked if there has been anything similar happen in Sioux Falls in recent years.

“Actually yes. But it turned out to be nothing,” says Cowbell. “There was thought to be a siting of Lochness Monster at Covell Lake but it turned out to be just a giant turd from when we dumped sewage into the lake.”

THIS ARTICLE WAS SATIRE, BUT I WILL LET STU WHITNEY BE THE JUDGE.

Who is investigating the Tuthill shooting incident?

l3wis January 7, 2015 5Comments

What smoking gun?

So I was talking to a public official yesterday and he asked me an interesting question;

“Who is doing an independent review and investigation of the Tuthill shooting?”

I told him that it seems they are reviewing it themselves (SFPD). He pointed out to me that since the SFPD doesn’t have an internal affairs department that normally if they have an officer use their firearm in a related shooting incident, the Sheriff’s office or the state DCI investigates it.

Maybe they are, maybe they aren’t. Will we ever know what happened?

UPDATE: The duties of a Police Force

l3wis January 3, 2015 22Comments

UPDATE: Now with scanner audio from that night. Most of it happens at the beginning, and you can tell the officer was clearly shaken.

[youtube]https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vmKHH4-ZOyc[/youtube]

SWAT a fly with a Bearcat? Does it look like it is driving on the sledding hill? (Image, Argus Leader Media)

This is a guest submittal;

The night of our recent police shooting was a glorious Sioux Falls winter evening. The weather was just right for some of us to be outside enjoying the crisp, calm night. There are people in the Midwest who enjoying walking on these types of evenings. There is a head clearing we are able to accomplish like at no other time of day or night. Its why we ski in bitter cold weather, it focuses our minds on what is important. It also brings to light the insanity of our recent police actions.

There is too much BS already involved in the Tuthill Park police shooting trying to justify the basic actions of police departments in the United States including ours. Militarization to protect and serve? Shooting first to ask the dead,  questions later? Policing forces driving around in cars, SUVs and Bearcats as if in fear? They see a person walking down a street in a hoodie and shoot first. Why?

Our current policing policies are sick. At what point do we quit killing citizens, maiming them and destroying their property because we have unskilled, undereducated people expressing their small man insecurities while wearing a badge? SWAT driving onto a lawn with a Bearcat, blowing windows out of laundry room just to scare someone into submission? Destroying innocent people’s property because the policing forces are afraid to engage the person holed up behind a stranger’s washing machine? You know the a human being will eventually give up if the utilities are shut-off, it might take longer but no one or property will likely get hurt. It’s this basic.

To everyone trying to justify this random shooting into the dark, it is not a matter to be swept under the rug. Killing in Florida, Ferguson, Staten Island or Sioux Falls out of a perceived fear by a policing force is never right. It is the police who have caused their own fear. The current system creates the mistrust. Police or citizens shooting first because they are afraid? Bullshit. Who made the policing forces the judge, jury and executioner?

What if the random shooting into the dark hurt or killed a very innocent person driving by on Cliff Avenue. Does the person walking through Tuthill Park get charged with murder because the cop was afraid?

We Americans are not respecting our policing forces because they have not earned it. Fire departments earn our respect everyday by running into danger to save us. Our current policing departments demand our respect at the end of a gun barrel or Taser.

Peel’s Principles of Modern Law Enforcement

Written by Sir Robert Peel, when he established the Metropolitan London Police in 1829

1. The basic mission for which police exist is to prevent crime and disorder as an alternative to the repression of crime and disorder by military force and severity of legal punishment.

2. The ability of the police to perform their duties is dependent upon public approval of police existence, actions, behavior and the ability of the police to secure and maintain public respect.

3. The police must secure the willing cooperation of the public in voluntary observance of the law to be able to secure and maintain public respect.

4. The degree of cooperation of the public that can be secured diminishes, proportionately, to the necessity for the use of physical force and compulsion in achieving police objectives.

5. The police seek and preserve public favor, not by catering to public opinion, but by constantly demonstrating absolutely impartial service to the law, in complete independence of policy, and without regard to the justice or injustice of the substance of individual laws; by ready offering of individual service and friendship to all members of society without regard to their race or social standing, by ready exercise of courtesy and friendly good humor; and by ready offering of individual sacrifice in protecting and preserving life.

6. The police should use physical force to the extent necessary to secure observance of the law or to restore order only when the exercise of persuasion, advice and warning is found to be insufficient to achieve police objectives; and police should use only the minimum degree of physical force which is necessary on any particular occasion for achieving a police objective.

7. The police at all times should maintain a relationship with the public that gives reality to the historic tradition that the police are the public and the public are the police; the police are the only members of the public who are paid to give full-time attention to duties which are incumbent on every citizen in the intent of the community welfare.

8. The police should always direct their actions toward their functions and never appear to usurp the powers of the judiciary by avenging individuals or the state, or authoritatively judging guilt or punishing the guilty.

9. The test of police efficiency is the absence of crime and disorder, not the visible evidence of police action in dealing with them.

Drop the box of Mac & Cheese or I will shoot!

l3wis January 2, 2015 17Comments

Like a lost episode of Beavis and Butthead where Todd gets shot at after wielding a TV remote control at officers, it seems we have trouble in Trouble Town;

The officer called out to the suspect to question him about the object in his hand. Clemens said the suspect then appeared to raise his hand in a motion in a way that made it seem as though he had a gun. The officer fired at the suspect, who then fled on foot.

Okay, I know, I try not to comment on crime in Sioux Falls, I strongly believe you are innocent until proven guilty, accept this time, the suspect got away. I will say this also, I am glad the officer was not hurt, and am also happy to hear, apparently the suspect was not injured either, ah, if there was one.

Now, I am not sure what happened, but I am in a speculating mood, so let’s go;

First, what we know;

1) The officer involved has only been on the force for about 2 years and is 27 years old.

2) The suspect was holding ‘something’. Could have been a stick, a box of mac & cheese or a gun.

3) The suspect didn’t respond to the officer’s request (to drop the Hot Pocket Pop Tart).

4) More then one round was fired at suspect (witnesses say up to 6 shots).

5) The officer’s audio recording was working but the patrol car camera was in the opposite direction.

Okay, so the speculation time;

• Could have been a homeless person hard of hearing with a can of Pringles in their hand

• Could have been a jogger with a flashlight

• Could have been Casper the Ghost (the non-friendly version)

At this point nobody knows what it was. But what is troubling is that the SFPD isn’t releasing key information;

1) How many rounds were fired?

2) What was on the audio recording?

3) Should an officer be approaching people in a public park simply because they are walking near a police car? Maybe the person was seeking help, like I said, they may have been hard of hearing, or injured, or confused.

Not sure how this will all turn out, but there is a lot of unanswered questions. Maybe someone needs to hack some emails and work out a sweet ass plea deal to figure this all out, ah, nevermind, that’s the fire department.

I find it troubling that an officer can fire at a person in a public place simply because the officer doesn’t understand the threat. If the suspect ever comes forward, I do think we need to take up a collection to buy him some new drawers.