How I love good satire, and Mr. Summers nails it. I have a feeling though that some Argus readers may not get the joke;
If your child really disappoints, consider more severe options like the “I Never Loved You” award, or the “Most Worthless Excuse For A Child” certificate. Harsh? Maybe. But nobody said winning was easy.
I have a feeling the rebuttal letters from the humor challenged are going to be more entertaining then this article itself.