Ugly Table #70
l3wis GETTING OLD SUCKS (Overheard by the host stand) Four elderly patrons approach the host stand and make a request, “Can we get a table as closest to the bathroom as…
The Ugly Table
Ugly Table #69
POINTLESS Yes, someone at work decided that putting an empty milk carton into a very tiny paper receptacle was a good idea. Remember, The Ugly Table is almost 90% customers,…
Ugly Table #68
What are you? Three years old? Customer: I will take a salad, only iceberg, dressing on the side. Me: Only iceberg? Nothing else? Customer: Yes. I bring an iceberg wedge…
Ugly Table advice
This school stumbled across my ‘Ugly Table’ prose and sent me this handy guide on tipping;
Ugly Table #67
TWO-DOLLAR BILL A customer (bragged) pointed out to me that she was tipping me with a two-dollar bill (On a $30 tab). I said ‘Thanks.’ in the most melancholy voice…