Why I love Sarah Silverman
l3wis Who doesn’t love a little ass grab?
February 2010
Oh, gotta love those kooky Republicant’s (H/T – Helga)
This survey says just how f’ing crazy they really are;
As I’ve mentioned before, I’m putting the finishing touches on my new book, American Taliban, which catalogues the ways in which modern-day conservatives share the same agenda as radical Jihadists in the Islamic  world. But I found myself making certain claims about Republicans that I didn’t know if they could be backed up. So I thought, “why don’t we ask them directly?” And so, this massive poll, by non-partisan independent pollster Research 2000 of over 2,000 self-identified Republicans, was born.
So sorry, we must cancel your event Comrade
For China’s Gay Community, The Show Doesn’t Go On
At the Mr. Gay China contest rehearsal, participants rehearsed for a fashion show and prepared to answer questions by a panel of judges. The plan was to send the winner to represent China at the worldwide Mr. Gay contest in Norway in mid-February.
Niu Niu said pageant organizers wanted to present an appealing and wholesome image of China’s “comrades,” as homosexuals are known in Chinese slang. “Healthy, fashionable and with a sunny and positive attitude,” Niu Niu said.
Despite his optimism, he said many of the would-be contestants had not yet gone public with their sexual orientation.
At the rehearsal, before the pageant was shut down, a 29-year-old business consultant with a dragon tattooed on his forearm asked that he be identified only by his first name — Justin.
“I don’t want my parents to know about this event,” he said with a laugh. “If I don’t win this competition and they see me, I’ll just deny it was me. If I win, then I’ll accept it and treat it as an opportunity to tell my parents the truth.”
THE EGGBERT FAMILY FINALLY WHIPS IT OUT ON GROUND HOT HOG DOG DAY…
EggBert Well, Howdy Hi-Hi, fellow hot bloggers:
The EggBert Family has been through quite the adventurous ordeal since last we encountered each other’s yummy-yum weenie-eating ways wayyyyy back on the Lord’s Day, Dec. 6th, 2009.
If ya all remember, after having had our beloved Republican SAVIOR, Sarah Palladin, sign her new “Gone Ragged” book for us at Barn’s & NoBalls in Sioux Falls, we high-tailed it over to our local Senior WeeWee Weiner Restaurant ( http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tJ7CVSTIgTo ) to sign Palladin’s daughter’s lover Levi’s weiner.Â
Well, as you can imagine, since God does indeed work in mysterious Senior WeeWee Weiner ways, things there turned out in our Weiner Winner Flavorable Way!!! As the entire EggBert family waited in the mile-long line full of mostly hungry & drooling SD GOOP (Grand Old Omniscient Party) Levi-Weiner-Lovers, we figured as much that we oughta prove our EggBert manhood & womenhood by making our best EggBert family attempt to conquest The Great Senior WeeWee Weiner Upchuck Challenge ( http://senorwiener.com/ ), thus, rightly earning yet another EggBert family legacy by having succeeded in becoming the first family of Winning Weeny-Eaters to be mounted on The Senior WeeWee Weiner Wall of Frankfarting Fame.
 Alas, as we chowed down on the many delightful, delicious, & wonderful Senior WeeWee Weiner’s weenies while waiting – the whole freakin’ house of franks collapsed (presumably under the massive weight of Senior WeeWee Weiners’ many fried, boiled, & grilled weenies along with the throngs of Levi-Loving weenies in line to sign Levi’s GOOPY – Grand Old Omniscient Party’s Yummer – weenie) into a Greasy Pit of Weeny Wonder…all of which the liberal-leanin’ local media failed to report (the bastardly hippies). Thank God we survived the past 2 months of underground weeny wonder because we had plenty of weiner to munch, cold & firm waffle fries to enjoy in various doggie-style positions to bide the time, Levi’s abstinence-first love-making tips, & a wireless laptop so we could all pleasure ourselves for days on-end (or “end-on-and-in-end,” as neighbor, Creamy Nugent, likes to put it or have it put) playing the meaningful internet game of “Help our beloved former President George Bush with his employment now that he was ILLEGALLY booted out of our White House by a Black O’BUMMER Liberal weenie Loser”  http://www.gamesheep.com/game/hot-dog-bush/?act=PlayNow
TODAY, February 2nd, 2010 – GROUND HOG DAY – (THOUGH WE HAVE NOW OFFICIALY RENAMED it GROUND HOT HOG DOG DAY) – all of us – 1) the entire EggBert family, 2) the illustrious & highly-educated Senior WeeWee Weiner staff, & 3) the entire Levi’s Weiner-Loving GOOPers - AND our long-lost relative, Frankfurterfarter Harry Dickie Willie John Thomas Goofenstein, the Fourth (our Step-Half-Cousin Twice-Removed)Â
who, coincidentally, we discovered in the bottom of the weeny pit – POPPED up our heads on this cold, wintery day, saw O’BUMMER’s “DARK” shadow, & rightfully so decided to return to the safe confines of the sewers of Sioux Falls & the greasy weenie pit of Senior WeeWee’s Gorged Restaurant – where we all will remain: buried, boiled, fried, & grilled – for the next 3 years, or at least, until the GOOPY weiner, once again, RISES…
Sincerely,
EggBert & family, the entire Senior WeeWee Weiner Staff, Levi’s weiner-loving SD GOOP fans, & most importantly, Levi & his weiner
