South Dakota Legislators look to limit Med MJ

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Detroit Lewis for Pierre BTT News


While 70% of South Dakota voters approved Medical Marijuana in November of 2020 and the state has worked for over a year to implement rules statewide along with local jurisdictions it hasn’t stopped some legislators from trying to limit it more.

“Initiatives? What are those?” asked Rep Jon Hansjob

I explained to him that petitioners travel across the state to gather thousands of voters signatures just to hopefully have the opportunity to put their initiative on the ballot and if it is able to receive the majority of votes from even thousands more of constituents it becomes law.

Hansjob responded, “What are constituents?”

After another long explanation to him, he replies, “The only laws that count are written by God and the SD GOP Legislative delegation . . . oh, and ALEC.”

I realized I was getting nowhere with Rep Hansjob as he begin to mutter something about bathrooms and started chasing some teenager in a rainbow colored wig while yelling at them ‘TERRORIST’.


I decided to see if I could track down the sponsor of most of these repeal bills, Rep Ted Doutche. I was hoping he would SPILL his guts to me so I could CLEANSE myself of my curiosities about the repeal bills.

While looking for Doutche I ran into Democratic Rep Austin Healey suddenly emerging from a mop closet to ask her what she thought about the MJ repeal bills. She replied, “What was your question about abortion and trans athletes?” Before I could repeat the question, she said, “I think it is perfectly fine for female trans athletes to use Medical MJ while they are pregnant, especially if they are seeking an abortion.”

Before I could ask her how any of that was even biologically possible she returned to the mop closet telling me, “Sorry, I have to return to the caucus meeting.” I asked if I could attend as a member of the press and she said, “While there is plenty of room for you, I would have to deny your request since Rep Lynn Doobage doesn’t like reporters breathing on her. And don’t look her in the eyes, that’s dangerous.”

I finally found Doutche guarding the door of the women’s bathroom with a AR-15. I asked him if any constituents asked him to repeal Med MJ after 70% of voters passed the initiative. Doutche responds, “When you say constituents you mean out of state lobbyists from the Big Pharma? Correct?”

I was going to ask him what voters were but I didn’t want to go down the same path as I did with Hansjob. I asked him, “Besides the lobbyists, what has possessed you to write these authoritarian bills that clearly violates what the voters asked for?” Doutche responds, “Let me fill you in on a little secret. While most reps here will tell you they are inspired by the Bible, Trump, FOX News or Noem, it’s really the circus music playing in our heads that guide us.”

Sioux Falls Female Mayoral Candidate Panera Limchikans comments on stubbing her toe

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I found this comment in an article on turkeyvulture605 interesting from a mayoral candidate;

“I’m glad I was wearing closed toe sandals,” she added. “Get your closed toe sandals. We know people who wear them are less likely to get it in a bad way and be hospitalized. I still think just the confusion among people is so great, it’s hard to correct at this point, especially if you are used to wearing open toe sandals.”

So which kind should you wear? It’s hard to know if you should sacrifice safety for being fashionable? Will Panera support a closed toe sandal mandate if she is elected? Where’s my right to show off my pretty painted toe nails?

*I wrote this post while being ‘NON-ANGRY’

AG Rumblestrips resigns post to run the Wild Bill Driving School

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Who says there isn’t a silver lining to every story?

While the pressure was put on by law enforcement officials, the governor and the legislature for Lil’ Janks Rumblestrips to resign as Attorney General it seems he decided to leave because of a great opportunity.

“Well, yeah, you know, yeah.” said Rumblestrips, “Yeah, they were considering me after I managed to only get a $500 fine after plowing over a man in a ditch after I was reading right-winger conspiracy theory websites on my phone. But what really convinced them was my $178 speeding ticket for going over 22 MPH a couple of days before my hearing.”

Board President of the driving school, Narc Podias, said, “It is one thing to deny you see a person go through your windshield, but to be speeding 20 miles over the speed limit just days from your hearing, that takes some serious balls, lack of brain cells or both!”

He of course has a different version of the story, “I’ll tell you what I told the officer, I didn’t see the speedometer or the speed limit sign, or the road for that matter, but was able to read some great tweets from Josh Hawley on my phone.”

Narc continues, “What makes him such a great candidate is as a high ranking Republican official in our state and the previous top law enforcement official, he is perfectly suited for teaching students how to drive like Bill drove, and how to bullsh!t your way out of it.”

Some of the courses include;

• I thought it was a deer (that’s what she said)

• Stop Signs? We don’t need no Stinkin’ Stop Signs

• Blame the Diet Coke

• It’s okay to speed as long as you pay your fines

• Only agree to a breathalizer 15 hours after the incident

• How to borrow a Sheriff’s car (when yours is totaled)

• How to take the ‘R’ out of Murder

• Play dumb

While Rumblestrips likely won’t be missed by our Governor and others in law enforcement, he will be a welcome addition to the Wild Bill Janklow Driving School team.

Is KELO News writing parodies now?

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When I have written parodies in the past, I have been warned by friends to be careful how I label them so people know for sure that it is a parody. I didn’t find a disclaimer on their latest article;

For dealing with such unprecedented problems all at once, Mayor Paul TenHaken is KELO.com News’ “Person of the Year for 2020.”

Boy, nothing like a good laugh right away in the morning. I am curious who with the news team at KELO decided this was a good choice (names please) and who were Paul’s competitors? Not sure, but they tell us why he was named (by unnamed folks) beating out (unnamed) competitors;

Sioux Falls mayors had faced civil unrest before. Sioux Falls mayors had faced great economic uncertainty. And Sioux Falls mayors had faced a pandemic. But none of them faced all three difficult situations at the same time in the same year. Under his watch, Mayor TenHaken navigated the city through the politics of the coronavirus, which also caused a bump in the city’s usually robust economy. And he had to quell a property damaging riot that sprang from a peaceful rally in response to the murder of George Floyd in Minneapolis.

First, I will state the obvious, you know I would not agree, but secondly, It kind of sounds like issues he should be dealing with as part of a job HE wanted. Notice they never mention the several times he said he was ‘sick of it’ and ‘didn’t sign up this’. Strangely they left that out of their nomination.

But let’s break down what they said;

• Economy. I may sound old fashioned but the mayor’s job, per the charter, is to be the City Manager. He basically runs the day to day operations of the city and manages the city employees. That’s all he does (or should I say his Chief of Staff). He has very little control over the overall private economy of the city. Mind you, he could have had a major impact, he could have found an early strategy to make sure places like the packing plant and nursing homes were operating safely. He did not, which brings us to the next item.

• Covid. Sure, Paul has taken some measures over the past couple of months with pressure from business owners, citizens, medical professionals and the city council but it was too late. For the first 6-7 months this was raging in Sioux Falls he hid under his desk and took the Noem/Trump view of the virus, if we just ignore it, it will go away. While he has lead better then Noem, that leadership surely wasn’t trophy worthy.

• Civil unrest. During the riot(?) at the mall (where some middle schoolers were throwing rocks) Paul was in a bunker somewhere in a city building watching it play out on a large screen TV. While I am glad that this incident did not result in massive property damage and injuries or death, I’m not sure having the National Guard on your speed dial makes you a champion of quelling civil unrest. I was in the march earlier in the day, and later watched livestreamed on FB. It was peaceful, all over town. The lights went down and some latch key kids got bored and made a rather peaceful protest look bad. If anyone should be commended it should be the people who stood in front of the officers to protect them from rocks.

Has Paul done some good things? Sure, his administration has pushed for treating the city employees better (part of his job) and he has been a big public advocate for mentorship and health and wellbeing. But I’m sure the above mentioned stuff was a bit of a stretch.

The thing that concerns me the most about Paul and his supposed leadership is his blatant disregard for open and transparent government and his efforts in the dark rooms at city hall to totally dismantle what little is left. Is it some kind of a sick joke that the media would pick someone for this honor that HATES open government? I’m not laughing anymore.